Rab Rakha (chapter II)

She said “It’s ok. You don’t lose by loving, you lose by holding back Rab”….!

                  I never lost anything; I never lost anything because I never wanted anything in my life. I was alone and content and I never tried to have anything which I thought I would not get it- I was egoistic. Simple routine that I followed, the only good thing about my day was meeting varied souls and there were really no strings attached with any one of them.  I would walk a mile with a beautiful girl or just a beautiful soul once a while and MOVE ON…

 There was no such soul in the world that could UNDERSTAND me and there was no such girl who would be like my IMAGINARY ANGEL. She was my only friend, my mate, my inspiration to start my day and she was my only hope- my angel.  She was in my mind throughout which in a way stopped me in getting attached to enticing beauties surrounding me. LOVE is a trap and no trap can keep me mentally happy.  To sum up- I operated my mind more than anything, not knowing that we feel, we love, we get hurt, we cry, we laugh, we understand and at times we think through our HEART.

There is no GOD, and even if he exists then he’s definitely not watching over me. He disturbs my mind, I do not trust him and so I am not afraid of him. I am not afraid of him because I am not obliged to any of his acts, he has not given me anything that I would be afraid to lose.  I was lonely and our so called GOD could not do anything about it. I was a strong believer of humanity and spirituality, music and dance, beauty and mind.

If I could survive the world with my eyes and my mind what was really the need of using the heart?  And since there is no possibility that GOD would ever in love with me (that he’ll ever make me meet my imaginary angel),  I was affording a life where there were really no relationships and no feelings, no aims which required to go out of the way for somebody, no Love no pain- not at all…!  

          

RAB,

We do not feel through our mind, we feel through our heart. Mind will guide you wrong at times but your heart will never cheat on you. Sometimes we cannot believe what we see and in that case we must believe what we feel.  Usually people who do not trust themselves, do not trust others.  We always see our worst selves, our worst side.  We need someone else to get close enough to tell us we are wrong. Someone we trust.

I trust you RAB.  And it’s a beautiful feeling.

I was alone, I was a ruthless soul, spoiled and heartless, I was incomplete- until I met her..!

Rab Rakha will be available on flipkart and infibeam for the people living in India and on www.uread.com for  the people living outside India. 

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